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LetterLetters

Truth about grief

Ajantha Jayabarathan
Canadian Family Physician February 2023; 69 (2) 80; DOI: https://doi.org/10.46747/cfp.690280
Ajantha Jayabarathan
Halifax, NS
MD CCFP FCFP
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Dr Chris Frank, your vivid and heart-wrenching narrative in the December 2022 issue of Canadian Family Physician touched me deeply.1 As we went through our medical training together at Western University in London, Ont, it felt like a reintroduction to humanity for me—both terrifying and hopeful. We put on our own protective layers, each of us outfitted differently to shield our own humanity from the onslaught of pain and suffering that was to be our daily bread.

Our own families were our foundation and our strength. Your profound loss tore that from you.

Your writing has laid bare the naked truth about grief. You have borne witness to its anguish and described the real journey and the toll that it takes. I thank you deeply for it. It must have been difficult to write about it.

My mother, who was my foundation, died from a ruptured aneurysm in 2018. Despite having had the best care and her own remarkable fortitude, her time came to an end. No last words, only loving goodbyes after vigils at the intensive care unit. I felt like an automaton for the years following her death: aching inwardly, allowing tears after work, then back to the same state, day after day.

Your journey has given me solace—with time and with acceptance, my grief will be less wounding.

I, too, believe the experience of grief has made me open up and step outside my protective covering. I have allowed myself to be human and minister to my wounds.

Dear friend, I am so sorry that you had to endure the loss of your dear Tracey as you did.

Footnotes

  • Competing interests

    None declared

  • Copyright © 2023 the College of Family Physicians of Canada

Reference

  1. 1.↵
    1. Frank C.
    A physician’s grief observed. Can Fam Physician 2022;68:915-6.
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Canadian Family Physician: 69 (2)
Canadian Family Physician
Vol. 69, Issue 2
1 Feb 2023
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Truth about grief
Ajantha Jayabarathan
Canadian Family Physician Feb 2023, 69 (2) 80; DOI: 10.46747/cfp.690280

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